"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." Robert A. Heinlein
The two most important words a man should know in any language: "yes, dear." ;)
Hm, now who said that...? Humphrey Bogart? The world's northernmost desert wind.
Methinks though that he said either that, or this: "A wise man does not contradict his wife; he waits until she does it herself."
Picture of the day: Bogie in Sirocco (1951). ;-)
The world's northernmost desert wind.
A friend of mine took Russian because the instructor was reputed to be very generous, but he was not sure he passed the final. So he went to see the instructor before the final results were announced (hoping to persuade the instructor to give him the credit). As he discovered, he had scored only 7 out of 100. I will become a patissier, God willing.
And excerpt:
"Things began to come together, and I went from speaking like an evil baby to speaking like a hillbilly. "Is them the thoughts of cows?" I'd ask the butcher, pointing to the calves' brains displayed in the front window. "I want me some lamb chops with handles on `em."" Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities. -Voltaire
Teufel means devil - baptism is :Taufe, only two letters. (I told her afterwards, after I had calmed down my sister and she stopped laughing, that if she had remembered that Teufel is male and Taufe is female she would not have made that mistake.)
Friend - "Zwei Bier bitte." Bartender - "Was?" Friend - "Zwei Bier bitte." Bartender - "Was?" (Just can't understand the thick southern accent.)
Ok, this same exchange happens one more time and my frustrated southern friend says: "two fucking beers, please!"
Bartender, in perfect English, replies: "That's better." Then promptly hands over two beers. :)
And Swiss German(s)...
I remember one time in a restaurant in the German speaking part of the Valais (Wallis) a bilingual mountainous canton in southern Switzerland.
A Swiss German guy at the next table is try to order.
Ich moechte Roesti (traditional Swiss dish of shredded potatos, baked in a clay container, sometimes other stuff added) Was moechten Sie? Roesti Was? Roesti!
this went on for a while till the waiter suddenly said 'aaah Roesti.' The Swiss Germans don't even understand each other sometimes, every damn valley has its own dialect. It's why the Swiss French complain that it is no use bothering to learn German, only the educated actually speak it and even they don't do so amongst themselves.
God I hate Dialekt (that and handwritten old German script. Completely illegible. Different alphabet basically where every letter looks the same in cursive, a good reason to stick to post WWII history)
And Sütterlin ... ooh, that's just not right... Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities. -Voltaire
There is one valley in the French part of Valois/Wallis inhabited by people with some mongoloid traits (especially eyes). The mythology has them as a marauding Hungarian tribe who decided to settle there, or alternatively, Huns a few centuries earlier. *Lunatic*, n. One whose delusions are out of fashion.