...last year in Fyffe alabama, they had all these UFO sightings. And apparently everyone in the town saw these UFOs. So I asked them what it was like. And this guy said "oh man, it was incredible, people wuz coming from miles around to look at 'em. Lotta people came armed".

People are bringing shotguns...to UFO sightings. Kinda brings a whole new meaning to the phrase "You ain't from round here, are ya boy ?".
I said to this guy "Why did y'all bring shotguns ?"
The guy said "Well, we didn't want to be abducted"
I'm thinking "Yea, and leave all this" Dude, if I lived in Fyffe, I'd be on my hands and knees every morning praying for abduction. And believe me, I would not be picky. Greyhound...Abduct me."
But I said "what do you mean...abducted ?"
He said "Well, they abduct people and perform scientific and medical experiments on 'em"
I said "Well maybe we'll get lucky and it's some kind of sterility/dentistry programme they got going. Maybe they come down, castrate you, straighten your teeth and split. A sorta clean up the universe pact"
He said "Huh ?"

I tell ya, that's starting to to depress me about UFOs. The fact that they cross galaxies to visit us and they end up in places like Fyffe, Alabama.Maybe these aren't super-intelligent beings, maybe they're like hillbilly aliens. Some intergalactic Joad family. "Oh, we don't wanna land in New York or LA. Nah, we just had a long trip - we're gonna kick back and whittle some. We're gonna enter our spaceship in the tractor pull...hu-huh"

Being invaded by rednecks. that's my greatest fear.