Soccer Is Ruining America Soccer is running America into the ground, and there is very little anyone can do about it. (...) Whether the dumbing down of America or soccer came first is hard to say, but soccer is clearly an important means by which American energy, drive and competitiveness are being undermined to the point of no return. What other game, to put it bluntly, is so boring to watch? (Bowling and golf come to mind, but the sound of crashing pins and the sight of the well-attired strolling on perfectly kept greens are at least inherently pleasurable activities.) The linear, two-dimensional action of soccer is like the rocking of a boat but without any storm and while the boat has not even left the dock. Think of two posses pursuing their prey in opposite directions without any bullets in their guns. Soccer is the fluoridation of the American sporting scene. For those who think I jest, let me put forth four points, which is more points than most fans will see in a week of games--and more points than most soccer players have scored since their pee-wee days. Any sport that limits you to using your feet, with the occasional bang of the head, has something very wrong with it. Indeed, soccer is a liberal's dream of tragedy: It creates an egalitarian playing field by rigorously enforcing a uniform disability. Anthropologists commonly define man according to his use of hands. We have the thumb, an opposable digit that God gave us to distinguish us from animals that walk on all fours. The thumb lets us do things like throw baseballs and fold our hands in prayer. We can even talk with our hands. Have you ever seen a deaf person trying to talk with his feet? (...) Sporting should be about breaking kids down before you start building them up. Take baseball, for example. When I was a kid, baseball was the most popular sport precisely because it was so demanding. Even its language was intimidating, with bases, bats, strikes and outs. Striding up to the plate gave each of us a chance to act like we were starring in a Western movie, and tapping the bat to the plate gave us our first experience with inventing self-indulgent personal rituals. (...) Everyone knows that soccer is a foreign invasion, but few people know exactly what is wrong with that. More than having to do with its origin, soccer is a European sport because it is all about death and despair. Americans would never invent a sport where the better you get the less you score. (...) And then there is the question of sex. I know my daughter will kick me when she reads this, but soccer is a game for girls. Girls are too smart to waste an entire day playing baseball, and they do not have the bloodlust for football. Soccer penalizes shoving and burns countless calories, and the margins of victory are almost always too narrow to afford any gloating. As a display of nearly death-defying stamina, soccer mimics the paradigmatic feminine experience of childbirth more than the masculine business of destroying your opponent with insurmountable power. Let me conclude on a note of despair appropriate to my topic. There is no way to run away from soccer, if only because it is a sport all about running. It is as relentless as it is easy, and it is as tiring to play as it is tedious to watch. The real tragedy is that soccer is a foreign invasion, but it is not a plot to overthrow America. For those inclined toward paranoia, it would be easy to blame soccer's success on the political left, which, after all, worked for years to bring European decadence and despair to America. The left tried to make existentialism, Marxism, poststructuralism, and deconstructionism fashionable in order to weaken the clarity, pragmatism and drive of American culture. What the left could not accomplish through these intellectual fads, one might suspect, they are trying to accomplish through sport. Yet this suspicion would be mistaken. Soccer is of foreign origin, that is certainly true, but its promotion and implementation are thoroughly domestic. Soccer is a self-inflicted wound. Americans have nobody to blame but themselves.
Soccer is running America into the ground, and there is very little anyone can do about it. (...) Whether the dumbing down of America or soccer came first is hard to say, but soccer is clearly an important means by which American energy, drive and competitiveness are being undermined to the point of no return.
What other game, to put it bluntly, is so boring to watch? (Bowling and golf come to mind, but the sound of crashing pins and the sight of the well-attired strolling on perfectly kept greens are at least inherently pleasurable activities.) The linear, two-dimensional action of soccer is like the rocking of a boat but without any storm and while the boat has not even left the dock. Think of two posses pursuing their prey in opposite directions without any bullets in their guns. Soccer is the fluoridation of the American sporting scene.
For those who think I jest, let me put forth four points, which is more points than most fans will see in a week of games--and more points than most soccer players have scored since their pee-wee days.
Yet this suspicion would be mistaken. Soccer is of foreign origin, that is certainly true, but its promotion and implementation are thoroughly domestic. Soccer is a self-inflicted wound. Americans have nobody to blame but themselves.
The mind boggles. In the long run, we're all dead. John Maynard Keynes
Now they know how our conservatives felt about the cultural philistinism of Hollywood. keep to the Fen Causeway
Soccer is the fluoridation of the American sporting scene. For those who think I jest,
Soccer is the fluoridation of the American sporting scene.
For those who think I jest,
I had to double-check that this is not a parody with a reference to Dr. Strangelove...
Mr. Webb is a professor of religion and philosophy at Wabash College. His recent books include "American Providence" and "Taking Religion to School."
Nuff said... *Lunatic*, n. One whose delusions are out of fashion.
refers to activism against the fluoridation of public water supplies.
The controversy occurs mainly in English-speaking countries, as Continental Europe does not practice water fluoridation, although some continental countries fluoridate salt.
*Lunatic*, n. One whose delusions are out of fashion.
Fluoridierung - Wikipedia
Die Fluoridproblematik hatte bereits bei mancherlei Gelegenheiten für politischen Zündstoff gesorgt[18][19][20] als sie sich auch im "Kalten Krieg" als probates Mittel erwies um politischen Druck zu erzeugen. In seinem 1952 veröffentlichten Werk The truth about water fluoridation behauptete Charles Eliot Perkins, die Wasserfluoridierung sei durch den in England geborenen russischen Kommunisten Kreminoff 1935 nach England gebracht worden. Kurz darauf hätten englische Sozialisten die Fluoridierung in den USA eingeführt, wo sie viele Anhänger in höchsten Positionen gehabt hätten.[21] Oliver Kenneth Goff erklärte 1957, er sei in den späten dreißiger Jahren in einem Kommunisten-Camp ausgebildet worden, wo man ihn lehrte, mit einem Sack Natriumfluorid im Wasserwerk den kompletten Wasservorrat einer Stadt zu vergiften und unter der US-Bevölkerung Lethargie zu erzeugen. Es sei während seiner Ausbildung auch darüber diskutiert worden, wie die Wasserfluoridierung in Russland zur Ruhigstellung in Gefangenen-Lagern eingesetzt worden sei.[22] Somit war "klar", dass ein echter Kommunist niemals fluoridiertes Wasser trinken würde. Umgekehrt konnte jemand, der fluoridiertes Wasser trank, nach dieser Logik unmöglich Kommunist sein. Wann immer also wieder einmal behauptet wurde, eine Regierung sei bis in höchste Positionen von Kommunisten durchsetzt, gehörte zur "Widerlegung" die öffentliche Erklärung man trinke selbst fluoridiertes Wasser. Dazu sahen sich gelegentlich sogar amerikanische Präsidenten genötigt: Dwight D. Eisenhower wusch sich so rein, und sein Nachfolger John F. Kennedy sah sich ebenfalls zu einer entsprechenden Erklärung genötigt.[23] Kennedy ließ in seiner Verteidigungsrede kein gutes Haar an der als rechtsradikal eingestuften John Birch Society, die ihn durch ihren wachsenden politischen Einfluss zum Handeln gezwungen hatte. Dieser amerikanischen anti-kommunistischen Logik nimmt sich ein Film von Stanley Kubrick an: Dr. Seltsam, oder wie ich lernte die Bombe zu lieben. In diesem 1964 gedrehten Film erklärt der durchgedrehte General Jack D. Ripper seinem Assistenten Captain Mandrake: "Auf keinen Fall wird ein Kommunist je ein Glas Wasser trinken, denn er weiß genau, aus welchem Grund... Fluoridation des Wassers - der grauenhafteste kommunistische Anschlag, dem wir ausgeliefert sind." Ripper selbst trinkt sinnigerweise nur "destilliertes Wasser" (Regenwasser) und "reinen medizinischen Alkohol" (Scotch). In Anspielung auf eine kommunistische Durchsetzung der Regierung versuchen der amerikanische und der russische Präsident als gute Freunde die von Ripper geschaffene Kriegsgefahr gemeinsam zu bannen. Das Werk wird heute noch gerne zur Polemik gegen Fluoridgegner missbraucht [24]. Während so die Auswüchse der McCarthy-Ära Fluoridgegner wirksam in Schach hielten, schlug die Amerikanische Zahnärztekammer (American Dental Association) mit ihren Dossiers über Fluoridierungsgegner in die gleiche Kerbe: Ärzte und Wissenschaftler, die sich gegen die Maßnahme aussprachen, wurden in einem Atemzug mit Perkins, Goff, der Birch Society und dem Ku-Klux-Klan vorgeführt.[25]
Die Fluoridproblematik hatte bereits bei mancherlei Gelegenheiten für politischen Zündstoff gesorgt[18][19][20] als sie sich auch im "Kalten Krieg" als probates Mittel erwies um politischen Druck zu erzeugen. In seinem 1952 veröffentlichten Werk The truth about water fluoridation behauptete Charles Eliot Perkins, die Wasserfluoridierung sei durch den in England geborenen russischen Kommunisten Kreminoff 1935 nach England gebracht worden. Kurz darauf hätten englische Sozialisten die Fluoridierung in den USA eingeführt, wo sie viele Anhänger in höchsten Positionen gehabt hätten.[21]
Oliver Kenneth Goff erklärte 1957, er sei in den späten dreißiger Jahren in einem Kommunisten-Camp ausgebildet worden, wo man ihn lehrte, mit einem Sack Natriumfluorid im Wasserwerk den kompletten Wasservorrat einer Stadt zu vergiften und unter der US-Bevölkerung Lethargie zu erzeugen. Es sei während seiner Ausbildung auch darüber diskutiert worden, wie die Wasserfluoridierung in Russland zur Ruhigstellung in Gefangenen-Lagern eingesetzt worden sei.[22]
Somit war "klar", dass ein echter Kommunist niemals fluoridiertes Wasser trinken würde. Umgekehrt konnte jemand, der fluoridiertes Wasser trank, nach dieser Logik unmöglich Kommunist sein. Wann immer also wieder einmal behauptet wurde, eine Regierung sei bis in höchste Positionen von Kommunisten durchsetzt, gehörte zur "Widerlegung" die öffentliche Erklärung man trinke selbst fluoridiertes Wasser. Dazu sahen sich gelegentlich sogar amerikanische Präsidenten genötigt: Dwight D. Eisenhower wusch sich so rein, und sein Nachfolger John F. Kennedy sah sich ebenfalls zu einer entsprechenden Erklärung genötigt.[23] Kennedy ließ in seiner Verteidigungsrede kein gutes Haar an der als rechtsradikal eingestuften John Birch Society, die ihn durch ihren wachsenden politischen Einfluss zum Handeln gezwungen hatte. Dieser amerikanischen anti-kommunistischen Logik nimmt sich ein Film von Stanley Kubrick an: Dr. Seltsam, oder wie ich lernte die Bombe zu lieben. In diesem 1964 gedrehten Film erklärt der durchgedrehte General Jack D. Ripper seinem Assistenten Captain Mandrake: "Auf keinen Fall wird ein Kommunist je ein Glas Wasser trinken, denn er weiß genau, aus welchem Grund... Fluoridation des Wassers - der grauenhafteste kommunistische Anschlag, dem wir ausgeliefert sind." Ripper selbst trinkt sinnigerweise nur "destilliertes Wasser" (Regenwasser) und "reinen medizinischen Alkohol" (Scotch). In Anspielung auf eine kommunistische Durchsetzung der Regierung versuchen der amerikanische und der russische Präsident als gute Freunde die von Ripper geschaffene Kriegsgefahr gemeinsam zu bannen. Das Werk wird heute noch gerne zur Polemik gegen Fluoridgegner missbraucht [24].
Während so die Auswüchse der McCarthy-Ära Fluoridgegner wirksam in Schach hielten, schlug die Amerikanische Zahnärztekammer (American Dental Association) mit ihren Dossiers über Fluoridierungsgegner in die gleiche Kerbe: Ärzte und Wissenschaftler, die sich gegen die Maßnahme aussprachen, wurden in einem Atemzug mit Perkins, Goff, der Birch Society und dem Ku-Klux-Klan vorgeführt.[25]
I didn't see this in the English wiki-page.
Water fluoridation has frequently been the subject of conspiracy theories. During the "Red Scare" in the United States during the late 1940s and 1950s, and to a lesser extent in the 1960s, activists on the far right of American politics routinely asserted that fluoridation was part of a far-reaching plot to impose a socialist or communist regime. They also opposed other public health programs, notably mass vaccination and mental health services.[46] Their views were influenced by opposition to a number of major social and political changes that had happened in recent years: the growth of internationalism, particularly the UN and its programs; the introduction of social welfare provisions, particularly the various programs established by the New Deal; and government efforts to reduce perceived inequalities in the social structure of the United States.[47] Some took the view that fluoridation was only the first stage of a plan to control the American people. Fluoridation, it was claimed, was merely a stepping-stone on the way to implementing more ambitious programs. Others asserted the existence of a plot by communists and the United Nations to "deplete the brainpower and sap the strength of a generation of American children". Dr. Charles Bett, a prominent anti-fluoridationist, charged that fluoridation was "better THAN USING THE ATOM BOMB because the atom bomb has to be made, has to be transported to the place it is to be set off while POISONOUS FLUORINE has been placed right beside the water supplies by the Americans themselves ready to be dumped into the water mains whenever a Communist desires!" Similarly, a right-wing newsletter, the American Capsule News, claimed that "the Soviet General Staff is very happy about it. Anytime they get ready to strike, and their 5th column takes over, there are tons and tons of this poison "standing by" municipal and military water systems ready to be poured in within 15 minutes."[7] This viewpoint led to major controversies over public health programs in the US, most notably in the case of the Alaska Mental Health Enabling Act controversy of 1956.[48] In the case of fluoridation, the controversy had a direct impact on local programs. During the 1950s and 1960s, referendums on introducing fluoridation were defeated in over a thousand Florida communities. Although the opposition was overcome in time, it was not until as late as the 1990s that fluoridated water was drunk by the majority of the population of the United States.[46] The communist conspiracy argument declined in influence by the mid-1960s, becoming associated in the public mind with irrational fear and paranoia. It was lampooned in Stanley Kubrick's 1964 film Dr. Strangelove, in which the character General Jack D. Ripper initiates a nuclear war in the hope of thwarting a communist plot to "sap and impurify" the "precious bodily fluids" of the American people with fluoridated water. Similar satires appeared in other movies, such as 1967's In Like Flint, in which a character's fear of fluoridation is used to indicate that he is insane. Even some anti-fluoridationists recognized the damage that the conspiracy theorists were causing; Dr. Frederick Exner, an anti-fluoridation campaigner in the early 1960s, told a conference: "most people are not prepared to believe that fluoridation is a communist plot, and if you say it is, you are successfully ridiculed by the promoters. It is being done, effectively, every day ... some of the people on our side are the fluoridators' 'fifth column'."[7]
Water fluoridation has frequently been the subject of conspiracy theories. During the "Red Scare" in the United States during the late 1940s and 1950s, and to a lesser extent in the 1960s, activists on the far right of American politics routinely asserted that fluoridation was part of a far-reaching plot to impose a socialist or communist regime. They also opposed other public health programs, notably mass vaccination and mental health services.[46] Their views were influenced by opposition to a number of major social and political changes that had happened in recent years: the growth of internationalism, particularly the UN and its programs; the introduction of social welfare provisions, particularly the various programs established by the New Deal; and government efforts to reduce perceived inequalities in the social structure of the United States.[47]
Some took the view that fluoridation was only the first stage of a plan to control the American people. Fluoridation, it was claimed, was merely a stepping-stone on the way to implementing more ambitious programs. Others asserted the existence of a plot by communists and the United Nations to "deplete the brainpower and sap the strength of a generation of American children". Dr. Charles Bett, a prominent anti-fluoridationist, charged that fluoridation was "better THAN USING THE ATOM BOMB because the atom bomb has to be made, has to be transported to the place it is to be set off while POISONOUS FLUORINE has been placed right beside the water supplies by the Americans themselves ready to be dumped into the water mains whenever a Communist desires!" Similarly, a right-wing newsletter, the American Capsule News, claimed that "the Soviet General Staff is very happy about it. Anytime they get ready to strike, and their 5th column takes over, there are tons and tons of this poison "standing by" municipal and military water systems ready to be poured in within 15 minutes."[7]
This viewpoint led to major controversies over public health programs in the US, most notably in the case of the Alaska Mental Health Enabling Act controversy of 1956.[48] In the case of fluoridation, the controversy had a direct impact on local programs. During the 1950s and 1960s, referendums on introducing fluoridation were defeated in over a thousand Florida communities. Although the opposition was overcome in time, it was not until as late as the 1990s that fluoridated water was drunk by the majority of the population of the United States.[46]
The communist conspiracy argument declined in influence by the mid-1960s, becoming associated in the public mind with irrational fear and paranoia. It was lampooned in Stanley Kubrick's 1964 film Dr. Strangelove, in which the character General Jack D. Ripper initiates a nuclear war in the hope of thwarting a communist plot to "sap and impurify" the "precious bodily fluids" of the American people with fluoridated water. Similar satires appeared in other movies, such as 1967's In Like Flint, in which a character's fear of fluoridation is used to indicate that he is insane. Even some anti-fluoridationists recognized the damage that the conspiracy theorists were causing; Dr. Frederick Exner, an anti-fluoridation campaigner in the early 1960s, told a conference: "most people are not prepared to believe that fluoridation is a communist plot, and if you say it is, you are successfully ridiculed by the promoters. It is being done, effectively, every day ... some of the people on our side are the fluoridators' 'fifth column'."[7]
Imprinting the proper loser psychosis in yet another Oranje generation :-) *Lunatic*, n. One whose delusions are out of fashion.
Shakhtar Donetsk gegen Werder Bremen.
Rumor has it that if Werder wins, Bremen will still be delivered gas no matter what happens next winter. If Shakhtar wins, the Bremen Mercedes yard will withdraw their support of Nabucco.
Werder is of course without its playmaker Diego, and also national team defensive cornerstone Per Mertesacker, as a result of totally shit fouls by the dirty hopeless hamburgers in the semis. Shakhtar has five brazilians in offense, and a compact, strong defense. Who knows???
Pundits from South Korea, South America and Saudi Arabia have picked Werder as the favorites, but most of yurp thinks Shakhtar has the advantage, because of the brazilians and the defense, and that our best players will watch from the stands.
i don't know what to think, other than that i won't be missing intertoobz access on wednesday evening. Wait, i do know what to think. Wereder's 20 year old next generation playmaker, with an unbelievable 23 assists in the Bundesliga this year, will be playing for the first time before his Turkish crowd in the stadium he dreamed of as a child. Mesut Özil. Count on him doing everything he can to make people know his time is coming.
That Werder youngsters scored both goals in the EM finale today? Omen? Entrails? Weiss es nicht. 3-2 Werder.
"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." - Anaïs Nin
[W]e may not be the biggest or the healthiest or the best educated. But we always did have one thing no other place did: We knew soccer was bullshit.
Sigh...
(Bowling and golf come to mind, but the sound of crashing pins and the sight of the well-attired strolling on perfectly kept greens are at least inherently pleasurable activities.)
Shorter WSJ douchebag:
If it involves fat, lazy white assholes like me, it's better.
Give me a break. Bowling and golf are not sports, first of all, any more than a typical Xbox game can be said to be a sport (and the hand-eye coordination is probably tougher to grasp on the Xbox game). Any moron can bowl or golf (except, you know, the President in the former game's case, but again the fat, lazy white assholes yaddayaddayadda...). Hell, I can bowl, and I can't run 50 yards without needing a ten-minute break to catch my breath, for Christ's sake.
Further, baseball is not demanding when you're a kid, because everybody sucks. Everybody learns how to take the balls and "earn" a walk, at which point you can steal your way to home plate. We perfected that ridiculous system when I was 8 years old and won every game simply by being faster than every other team. You know how we did it? By figuring out that the pitchers all. fucking. sucked.
On it being a girl sport -- well, no. Girls play it, and most could probably beat this pencil-dicked WSJ hack senseless, but I wouldn't call it a "chick sport". Certainly the Brazilians and Germans are no pansies. I'm an American football guy. I like soccer, and I can get into it during the World Cup when it actually matters, but it's too random and fast for me. It's hockey with feet and fewer sharp objects, and without the Canadian and Russian Neanderthals beating the snot out of each other for reasons that still escape me. It's not nearly brutal enough (hockey is too brutal, American football is just right). And I tend to look at things in terms of "Could these guys play (some other sport, usually American football)?" in order to judge worthiness. And the answer is inevitably No, because most soccer/rugby/whatever players are too slow, and because most American football players would have no problem breaking them in half on any generic play (rugby players in particular are notorious for getting ripped to shreds in American football).
All things considered, I'm glad to see kids playing soccer instead of baseball. Baseball sucks, and only people from New Yohhhrk and BASTAHN care about it, and they only do because of New York's consistent championship performances and Boston's ridiculous need to beat the Yankees due to its hilarious inferiority complex.
Soccer's a much more exciting sport than baseball. I nominate it as our second sport. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. - George Carlin
I'd love to see the nfl guys run for 90 minutes while having zweikampf with no protection. they'd faint dead.
wanna bet? "Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." - Anaïs Nin
I'm not sure how we'd settle that bet you suggest, but, yes, I would take it in a heartbeat. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. - George Carlin
American football is about sumo-style leverage on the line, vision at running back and QB, positioning at linebacker, and speed for wide receivers and corners. These skills are no joke at the pro level, but they're not in the same league as what is required for baseball.
you are the media you consume.
Your brain has to judge the flight of a ball that is moving (sometimes in random way with a kuckleball) and ensure that you swing a 3 inch wide bat in such a way that a 1/10 inch section of the bat 4/5 of the way along the length and 1/3 of the way from centre to top hits a 1/10 inch of the ball 1/3 of the way from centre to bottom.
In half a second. On paper it looks impossible and for 99.999% of humanity, it is. That's why they get paid so much. And that's why people get angry when the guys that can do that then take steroids to cheapen it. keep to the Fen Causeway
A pitcher's motion is controlled uncoiling chaos, forcing your torso and arm to emulate Archimedes maximum thrust, releasing at exactly the moment where the ball will fly with controlled spin to where you want it. All the while hiding you fingers from the batter, while keeping an eye on the runners.
Ballet? Watch a shortstop or 2nd baseman fly over the runner sliding directly at him with steel spikes aimed at your thighs. Or a 3rd basemen leaping for a backhand liner. Or the ability to shift direction rounding first, stretching a single into a double, without losing speed or momentum, ending in a hard pop-up slide at second.
Plus you got literary mystique, who'lda thunk it! "Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." - Anaïs Nin
Leave it to a Turkey-Switzerland or Celtic-Rangers match :-) ...or to hooligans on the tribune or on the streets :-(
most soccer/rugby/whatever players are too slow, and because most American football players would have no problem breaking them in half on any generic play
I would be really curious at a football players vs. American 'foot'ball players match. With a defense stacked by the likes of Rio Ferdinand and Materazzi, an attack staffed with the likes of van Bommel and Rooney; I wonder if ball-handing, foul-evading and foul-play skills would be a match for superior body strength on the other side. They could also just play on their own endurance and try to tire the opponents; though if the format includes frequent commercial breaks... *Lunatic*, n. One whose delusions are out of fashion.
Aren't those also features of American Football?
In much of the rest of the world, it is soccer that is played in pick-up games. The brainless should not be in banking. — Willem Buitler
