There is this extremely successful Madison Avenue advertising executive, about 55 years of age, his children are all grown and in university. He has many, many millions of dollars. He is getting quite bored with his existence, has little relation with his wife and children, and in effect is questioning his whole existence. Someone introduces him to Castaneda's "The teachings of Don Juan." He reads it and is blown away. "Holy shit" he says to himself, "I'm wasting my whole life." He decides to sell his interest in the advertising agency, put all his money in trust for his family, keep one million dollars for himself and begin a quest to find out what "the meaning of life" is, something his religion could never answer. His family is quite pissed at him, and he realizes that he may lose them, but it is not possible for him to abort his adventure.
He heads of to the Mexican border to search enlightenment just as Castaneda did.
He is introduced to some Mexican sorcerers who in turn introduce him to the ancient mind expanding drugs of the Indians, what we would call mescaline from the cactus plant. He stays with the Indians for several months slowly learning the way of the cactus plant. Finally, he gets up the nerve to ask his master, "Can you tell me the meaning of life?" Surprised, his master replies "I cannot tell you that? But there may be this great man, who we have heard of who lives on top of a volcano in Hawaii who might be able to answer that question.
Needless to say the same thing happened with the great man who lived on top of the volcano in Hawaii as well as the Japanese zen master who followed, and the Chinese Taoist sifu in Beijing. No one could answer his question. The years were quickly passing for the former executive. It is now 1980. His money was running out, his weight had gone from 180 to 130 pounds. He is most distressed and depressed.
Finally, he's in Turkey. Someone he encounters tells him about this great rabbi who resides on the top of the Mount of Olives in Israel who might help him in his quest. Legend has it that this rabbi is more than 100 years old.
Suffering from exhaustion the former executive decides to give it one last try. He arrives in Tel Aviv and then he takes a bus to the Mount of Olives. At the foot of the Mount he starts to ask people about this great rabbi who could answer his great question. He is introduced to the first secretary of the great rabbi and begs him to arrange an interview. The secretary tells him he'll try; to go back to the hotel and he'll get back to him in a day or two. At 8 a.m. the next morning, on a beautiful April day, an emissary from  the great rabbi arrives and says to the executive, come with me; the Rabbi will see you now. It's not too high as mounts go and it took about 2 hours to walk up and arrive at the rabbis enclave, several modest wood cabins in a semi circle. In the center of this semicircle sat the rabbi on a modest high backed chair, talking to his disciples. The emissary went to the rabbi and he beckoned the executive to have a seat about 10 feet in front of the rabbi.
He was a medium size man rather old with a white beard and mustache. His eyes were wide open and alert like those of a young man. What can I do for you my friend?" the rabbi asked.
The executive said, "Rabbi, I have been travelling the earth for many years now seeking to know the meaning of life. I've been to Mexico, Hawaii, Japan, China and Turkey, and I've probably forgot other places, but I've had no success. Can you help me?
I think I can said the rabbi.
"Please Rabbi, tell me: what is the meaning of life?"
The rabbi was very quiet for about one minute. Then he said: "LIFE IS A FOUNTAIN."
The executive looked puzzled for a moment and then he said: "life is a fountain?" "For seven years I've been traveling, searching for the meaning of life; I've lost everything; my business, my fortune , my family, my health, I finally find you and you tell me that "LIFE IS A FOUNTAIN?"
The executive then starts to lose his head and starts to scream at the rabbi: "LIFE IS NOT A FOUNTAIN, LIFE IS NOT A FOUNTAIN, LIFE IS NOT A FOUNTAIN!"

The rabbi looks at the executive, thinks for a 30 seconds or so, shrugs his shoulders, and says: "SO, life is not a fountain!

Happy New Year To All! Update [2008-1-5 19:20:25 by LEP]: Ending according to DoDo:

"Please Rabbi, tell me the meaning of life!"
The Rabbi was very quiet for a minute and then said: "LIFE IS A MESSAGE, but you can never understand it because you are only the messenger."
The executive looked at the Rabbi for 30 seconds and replied: "OH SHIT!"