I think gender becomes a fundamental part of our self identification and hence our relationship to others.  It is something we learn "at our mother's knee," long before we have any rational conception of what it means.  I'm not sure there is any way around it.  For good or ill, it colors everything else about us.

I remember Daneel.  I had a clear conception of "him" as a male.  I don't know if Asimov intended that, but I never doubted it.  On the other hand, I can imagine someone who hasn't read Asimov thinking otherwise.

We all bleed the same color.