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On the one hand, I still believe what I said was right, in some way. I saw her as this amazing human being, and compartmentalizing that amazing person into a box labeled "Black Woman" seemed like such a reduction of who she really was and who she could be. On the other hand, who am I to tell her that she should abandon -- or "transcend" -- her black identity? How could I -- a non-black man -- possibly understand what her experience was like, much less judge how she decided to view herself? Virtually abstract questions for me, but very concrete, urgent questions for her. Truth unfolds in time through a communal process.
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